Because it is so multi-faceted, misperceptions about anger abound, and the question arises: how shall we regard anger? How do we advise the client to think about it? Folk wisdom often would say that the best thing to do is just let it all out, but is it? Clients complain that they cannot control it, that the tendency to be easily angered is inherited, but again, is there evidence for that? This article expores common myths people tend to hold about anger, and factual statements following them that you can use to clarify for the client why learning to deal with problem anger is time well spent.
In a previous article, we defined habits, looked at how they are formed (through the lens of Duhigg’s and Clear’s models), and then outlined the science behind them. According to James Clear’s Four Laws of Behaviour Change (2018), there are four steps to establishing a habit: cue, craving, routine, reward (Clear, 2018). This article is about how we turn the above steps into practical actions/advice that can help clients not only alter the way they do things, but also make the changes stick.
The morning alarm jolts you awake, and you roll over to swat the snooze button – just like that, Monday has come again, along with another working week. You mourn the freedoms of the weekend and drag yourself out of bed whilst wondering why your alarm’s tone is so irritating. “I need coffee”, you think. […]
It’s a new year, we’ve all renewed ourselves with a fabulous holiday break, and we’re raring to go again, having said goodbye to the factors stressing us in 2020, right? Or maybe not. Much of the developed world has, at this writing, only recently come out of lockdown from the COVID-19 pandemic, and many countries […]
Imagine a self-care strategy which relies solely on you. It can be done in a quiet space or on-the-go; it can take place individually or with like-minded others; and it can be flexible to your needs and circumstances. Furthermore, in a time when uncertainty never feels too far away, it is unlikely to become a casualty of lockdown or physical distancing. Within a working context, if utilised properly, this self-care strategy can enable you to become a better helping professional, as well as inform and improve upon your interactions and practices with clients. Welcome to the world of mindfulness.
For quite some time now, many of our readers and students have wanted a Mindfulness program that not only teaches them about Mindfulness, but progressively helps them integrate Mindfulness into their lives for enhanced wellbeing. Well, we listened, and now we’re delivering! The resultant program is Living a Mindful Life. Living a Mindful Life This was […]
“You should always believe your clients,” said the counselling-training professor to the trainees, “and you should always disbelieve them” It’s possible that that advice — confusing and impossible as it seems to be — is useful not only for therapists listening to clients, but to any of us listening to a fellow human being. Even […]
You know the feeling. The person seems to be making a reasonable request, or advising you to do something “for your own good”, but inside your guts are completely churned up! What’s going on? The chances are that you are experiencing an attempt to manipulate you. Sadly, manipulation is rife in the real world and […]
INTIMACY! Ok, now that we have your attention . . . let’s try another cue: SPIRITUALITY! And now, we’d like to know: what was the difference in your reaction to the two words? For many, intimacy conjures up juicy images of sexual trysts with the mythically perfect lover: one who attends to our every need […]
The tree is aglow with the presents all wrapped, the holiday baking is done, and Aunt Daisy has promised to be on her best behaviour. Your client is ready for Christmas — or maybe not. As the siren call of “happy holidays” beckons, many people are thrilled to come to the end of the year. […]
Your new boss shifts the goal posts, demanding a much higher volume of work from you than the high level that was expected before. You take one look at all the new tasks you must do, throw up your hands in despair, and angrily write out your resignation letter. Did you give up or did […]
What’s your reaction when your client leans forward in her chair and her voice drops to a whisper as she confides, “You know, I just get so sleepy after lunch that I feel I must have a nap, or I can’t function — but then I feel so guilty!”? Do you nod sagely, “getting” what […]
Maggie, a counsellor, saw a client in the morning who related how his doctor had just given him a diagnosis of cancer, necessitating cutting out some cancerous tissue. Her client, Arnold, was dismayed about the diagnosis. “But at least,” he confided to Maggie, “I don’t have to have that horrible colostomy bag like some people […]
It’s becoming increasingly “official”. More and more, we human beings are using our furry, feathered, and finned fellow beings to help us heal. It’s called animal-assisted therapy, or AAT, and the purpose of this post is to introduce you to it, a therapy adjunct since the 1990s. We look into what it is, how we […]
As the population ages in nations such as Australia and the United States, increasing numbers of offspring wonder how to help their retired, now lonely, and often depressed parent. Some of these may ask you for advice on how to help their beloved mum or dad. Of course, health problems must be tended to, but […]