Relationships

Rebuilding Romantic Intimacy

If you are in a long-term relationship, you may find yourself reminiscing about the past and asking yourself: what happened to the joy we used to feel in the honeymoon period? In this article, we focus on this question, and numerous strategies to help rebuild your romantic intimacy.

Anger Management: De-escalating Anger

Would you know what to say or do in order to de-escalate from a client – or anyone – threatening to harm you if they don’t get what they want? Would you know – if all else fails – how to keep yourself safe in a violent situation? In this article, we share with you a set of responses for dealing with an angry person – safely – at each of seven levels of anger.

Busting Common Myths About Anger

Because it is so multi-faceted, misperceptions about anger abound, and the question arises: how shall we regard anger? How do we advise the client to think about it? Folk wisdom often would say that the best thing to do is just let it all out, but is it? Clients complain that they cannot control it, that the tendency to be easily angered is inherited, but again, is there evidence for that? This article expores common myths people tend to hold about anger, and factual statements following them that you can use to clarify for the client why learning to deal with problem anger is time well spent.

Dealing with Deception in Counselling

“You should always believe your clients,” said the counselling-training professor to the trainees, “and you should always disbelieve them”  It’s possible that that advice — confusing and impossible as it seems to be — is useful not only for therapists listening to clients, but to any of us listening to a fellow human being. Even […]

Working with Angst in Counselling

What do you say to a client whose presenting issue is deep angst over the question of relationship? Whether the person is in a primary relationship and deeply unhappy, questioning whether to stay or to go, or the person longs for that primary relationship in order to feel happy and fulfilled, the issue is a […]

Getting Smart with Giving Feedback

“Your meals are disgusting!” she shouted. A look of deep hurt flashed across his face before anger kicked in. “You don’t need to be cooked for anyway,” he retorted. “Your bottom’s gone way beyond cute!” Does anything familiar echo here? What about in the following exchange? “Darling,” he said, repeating his familiar compliment, “You’re beautiful.” […]