Have you ever sat in session, listening to your client explain why they were angsty over some issue, only to find that you experienced a rising panic and sense of helplessness – because you, too, were dealing with the same issue? Have you ever finished a session with a deeply depressed client, only to find […]
The Eclectic Therapist
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What are your expectations about what will happen in your clinical supervision, and what you will get from it? Are you able to identify your greatest needs to meet in the process? How do you name the short-, medium-, and long-range goals that you will attempt to achieve in supervision? These questions are important to […]
“U R ugly, fat, and stupid.” “The world is too good a place for U – ur pathetic.” “Why don’t you just kill ur self and make us all happier?” These hurtful, horrible messages and many others like them are well-known to kids and teens who have been cyberbullied. Parents, teachers, counsellors, and school authorities, […]
INTIMACY! Ok, now that we have your attention . . . let’s try another cue: SPIRITUALITY! And now, we’d like to know: what was the difference in your reaction to the two words? For many, intimacy conjures up juicy images of sexual trysts with the mythically perfect lover: one who attends to our every need […]
You hand your friend the beautifully wrapped gift. In delight, your dear one excitedly strips off the bow and wrapping, lifts the box, and then says in a crestfallen voice, “I can’t wear wool; it makes me itch. Here, you can have it back.” Can you imagine how deflated and hurt you would feel if […]
What do you say to a client whose presenting issue is deep angst over the question of relationship? Whether the person is in a primary relationship and deeply unhappy, questioning whether to stay or to go, or the person longs for that primary relationship in order to feel happy and fulfilled, the issue is a […]
At the heart of narrative therapy – and the crucial aspect distinguishing it from more empirically-based therapies (such as CBT) – is the question of how we can know reality. Empiricism tells us that there a single “truth” waiting for us to discover it. Narrative therapists, on the other hand, recognise that the operative word […]
Many people view a new year as a clean slate: a chance to start afresh, including emotionally. For some this includes healing from past hurts which may have kept the person from moving forward in life. If a client comes to you with forgiveness on her mind – and, perhaps, whether she should or should […]
The holidays are finished, the relatives have gone home, and your clients are trickling back in, many of them armed with an awesome set of resolutions for what they plan to accomplish. A brand new year is like a clean slate: hopeful, invigorating and full of promise. But the road to realisation of goals is […]
“The way my manager looked at me when I turned in the report – I know he’s planning to sack me soon.” “I can by the way she kissed me; my wife is cheating on me for sure!” “That horrid tart dating my dad is just after his money – to cut my brother and […]
The tree is aglow with the presents all wrapped, the holiday baking is done, and Aunt Daisy has promised to be on her best behaviour. Your client is ready for Christmas – or maybe not. As the siren call of “happy holidays” beckons, many people are thrilled to come to the end of the year. […]
Your new boss shifts the goal posts, demanding a much higher volume of work from you than the high level that was expected before. You take one look at all the new tasks you must do, throw up your hands in despair, and angrily write out your resignation letter. Did you give up or did […]
How do you respond when your client asks in distress: “Why am I having all these wild dreams?”? Do you know what purpose the client’s dreams may be serving? If your honest answer is “no”, you are not alone. While theories on why we dream abound, it’s hard to get at dreams directly. The main […]
If you’ve been a professional helper for a while, you have probably sensed that the fields we work in (counselling/psychotherapy, psychology, social work, etc.) have changed in recent years. As the world we live in becomes increasingly polarised, so too do the beliefs and values of people drawn to radicalisation toward extremism; for many of […]
What’s your reaction when your client leans forward in her chair and her voice drops to a whisper as she confides, “You know, I just get so sleepy after lunch that I feel I must have a nap, or I can’t function – but then I feel so guilty!”? Do you nod sagely, “getting” what […]