Looking for maladaptive communication patterns is a common form of assessment that therapists use (Long & Young, 2007). Based on John Gottman’s theory popularly known as the “Four Horseman of the Apocalypse”, the following subheadings are common communication problems that most couples experience or participate in. They include; criticism and complaint, defensiveness, contempt, and stone […]
Communication
Values and Conflict Resolution
Every person has distinctive viewpoints that are equally valid (from where they stand) as the other party involved in the conflict. Each person’s viewpoint makes a contribution to the whole and requires consideration and respect in order to form a complete solution. This wider view can open up the communication transaction possibilities. It may require […]
- July 19, 2010
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- Counselling Theory & Process, Personal Effectiveness, Workplace Issues
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Romance, Intimacy and Conflict
Becoming a couple is one of the most complex relationships in adulthood. It is also well known that being a couple can contribute to personal growth and self awareness (Long & Young, 2007). Romantic couples are a unique type of relationship that is different from friendships and family bonds because it is based on romantic […]
- May 17, 2010
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- Relationship & Families
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Motivational Interviewing Techniques
The fundamental approach to motivational interviewing interactions?contains the following four elements: Open-ended questions Affirmations Reflective listening Summaries Motivational interviewing creates an acronym OARS from this and the goal in using OARS is to assist the person to move forward, creating change talk and motivation from within. This change talk contains statements that the client may […]
- April 30, 2010
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- Counselling Theory & Process, Counselling Therapies
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The Value of Empathy in Counselling
A requirement for being an effective counsellor is being able to practice and impart the skill of empathy in the client-counsellor interaction. Being empathetic ensures you are listening and dealing with the clients concerns as they present them. You are not judging them. In this post we’ll look at how empathy can assist counsellors when […]
- April 27, 2010
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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Grief Counselling through Questioning
Questioning is used for therapeutic assessment and to facilitate the client’s expression of emotion, which is a crucial part of the therapeutic process in complicated grief counselling. Examples of questions and their purposes are outlined below. Questions “Can you tell me about the death?” “What happened that day”? “Where were you when you found out […]
- March 16, 2010
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- Counselling Theory & Process, Loss & Grief
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How Healthy Intimacy is Developed
Intimacy is one of the main ingredients of a successful, ‘ideal’ relationship along with passion and commitment (Hanna, 1991). Intimacy is a journey — it is not a tangible thing. It takes place over time, is ever-changing and is not stagnant. In fact, any kind of stagnation in a relationship may damage intimacy. It is […]
- February 16, 2010
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- Relationship & Families
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Parenting Styles in Counselling
Many parents who have come to the counselling session are prepared to speak with the counsellor to gain some insight into an issue or problem. But some parents do not understand why they need to be involved in the counselling sessions, and others know why, but do not want to be involved. Silent Some parents […]
- January 8, 2010
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- Children & Adolescents, Relationship & Families
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Counselling Microskills: Influencing
Influencing is part of all counselling. Even if the counsellor only used attending skills to actively listen to the client, being genuinely heard by another person can influence a person’s behaviour. Influencing skills take a more direct approach to client change, with specific alternatives for actions that can promote change quicker and in some cases […]
- November 12, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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Counselling Microskills: Client Observation
By accurately observing non-verbal behaviour, a counsellor can gauge the affect her/his words and actions have upon the client. Skilled client observation also allows the counsellor to identify discrepancies or incongruities in the client’s or their own communication. When is it used? Observation is a skill that is utilised throughout the entire counselling interview. Examples […]
- November 11, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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Counselling Microskills: Confrontation
Generally speaking the term confrontation means challenging another person over a discrepancy or disagreement. However, confrontation as a counselling skill is an attempt by the counsellor to gently bring about awareness in the client of something that they may have overlooked or avoided. There are three steps to confrontation in counselling. The first step involves […]
- November 10, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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Counselling Microskills: Responding, Noting and Reflecting
Accurate Responding allows the counsellor to confirm with the client that they are being heard correctly. Noting and reflecting are used to bring out underlying feelings. When are they used? Responding is useful throughout all stages of a counselling interview. It helps the counsellor to clarify and encourage clients’ stories. This is also a great […]
- November 9, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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Counselling Microskills: Attending Behaviour
Attending behaviour is a counselling microskill used to encourage clients to talk and show that the counsellor is interested in what’s being said. When is it used? Throughout the entire counselling interview. Particularly important in the initial stages of establishing rapport. Examples Attentive body language (eye contact, leaning forward slightly, encouraging gestures). Eye contact is […]
- November 5, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process
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How Can Clients Become More Assertive?
It is beneficial for clients who are struggling with passive or aggressive communication to be encouraged by counsellors to become more assertive. In this post we outline a step-by-step process to teach clients assertiveness skills. Step one: Assessment of current communication style The first step in teaching a client to become more assertive is for […]
- October 12, 2009
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- Counselling Theory & Process, Personal Effectiveness
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Developing Respect for the Counselling Client
If not the most important feature of professional counselling, “respect for the client” is definitely high up on the priority list. Geldard and Geldard (2005) explain that regardless of who the client is, and regardless of their behaviour, the client has come to the counsellor for assistance and deserves to be treated as a person […]
- September 8, 2009
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- 136515
- Counselling Theory & Process
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