Unfortunately, ‘organisational restructuring’ and ‘downsizing’ are common events in today’s workplace. For those individuals who suddenly lose their job, financial pressures can be overwhelming. Most support individuals receive focuses on helping them to plan financially. However even under the best conditions where someone has ample savings and decent job prospects, suddenly losing a job is an emotional ride.

The emotional stress that individuals and their families experience is the least discussed effect of unemployment. For many people work is a central component to their identity. When their employment status changes, so too can their self-concept or sense of identity. This, together with financial strain, can mark a very stressful and negative time. 

The experience of sudden unemployment can propel an individual through the troughs of despair to the peaks of hopefulness and back again. The role of a counsellor, during this journey, is to recognise and effectively respond to the client’s ever-shifting emotional undercurrent.

In order to work effectively with someone coping with unemployment, counsellors needs to be clear about the unique impact the loss has had and is continuing to have on the individual. Nonetheless, theoretical models, outlining the stages of loss can provide a helpful framework from which more individualised approach can evolve. 

Birkel & Miller (1998) suggests that the emotional manifestations of job loss follow a similar pattern to the stages Kubler-Ross identified as typical of a grief response to death and dying.

Stage 1: Shock and denial

In the initial stages after job loss, individuals often respond with disbelief, shock or denial. Thoughts such as, “How can this be happening? “, “It must be a mistake”, and “No, it can’t be. This isn’t right”, are common during this time.

Counselling during this stage should allow the individual time to come to terms with the shock of unemployment. Counsellors should utilise their core skills of active and reflective listening to allow the individual to consider and discuss their experience. Clients should only be encouraged to share the news of their unemployment with others once they have been able to recognise and, in part, accept the reality of their circumstance.

Stage 2: Fear and panic

The dissipation of shock and denial is often replaced with feelings of fear or panic. Thoughts such as, “I’ll lose everything”, “My career is over” or “What if I never work again?” are common at this stage.

Individuals experiencing fear and panic as a result of sudden unemployment may find everyday choices challenging. With hesitancy and uncertainty leading to indecision, individuals may experience intense apprehension as they ponder about a financially uncertain and unknown future.

To assist clients experiencing these anxieties, counsellors may employ cognitive strategies designed to minimise fear and panic. Such strategies include:

1. Thought stopping
2. Establishing a pre-determined time to think about concerns
3. Writing down fears and questioning their validity

Thought stopping - Thought stopping is a stress reduction technique that’s designed to lessen the impact of negative, obsessive thoughts and/or imagery. The technique is relatively simple to explain, but can be challenging for clients to implement.

There are a variety of thought stopping strategies that can be taught to clients who are experiencing intrusive thoughts as a result of sudden job loss. These include:

1. Replacing one thought with another (eg. the thought of bankruptcy is replaced with thoughts of skill development).
2. Hearing words such as “stop”, “relax”, “I’m okay”, or seeing the image of a stop sign or red light whenever destructive, unwanted thoughts arise.
3. Using positive imagery to divert a particular line of thinking (e.g. seeing yourself being successful in a job interview).

Initial thought-stopping training:

1. Use gentle relaxation strategies to assist your client to relax. Try controlled breathing or progressive muscle relaxation.
2. Allow your client to begin thinking about their unemployment or results of their unemployment.
3. Once a thought pattern has been established, clap or say “stop”, loudly enough to distract your client from their train of thought.
4. Invite your client to reflect on what happened to their thoughts.
5. Assuming the negative or obsessive thoughts disappeared; repeat the process, gradually decreasing the intensity of the distraction.
6. Encourage the client to create their own, mental distraction (image, sound or both) that they may implement as a way of stopping the stream of unwanted thoughts.
7. Practise this technique over the next three counselling session and encourage your client to practise in their own time also.

(Technique adapted from - Palmer, S. & Dryden, W. (1995). Counselling for stress problems. London: Sage)

Establishing a pre-determined time to think about concerns (a worry-appointment) - When excessive worry or fear interferes with a client’s day-to-day experience, counsellors may introduce the technique of a “worry-appointment”.

As the name suggests, a worry-appointment is a specific time set aside for worry each day. It might be 15 minutes at the end of the day or 10 minutes at lunchtime. At other times during the day when worry strikes, clients are encouraged to delay the worry until the scheduled time.

Establishing a worry-appointment, in this way, offers clients a strategy for postponing worry and controlling the intrusion of thoughts. By providing permission for “worry” at a scheduled time, this technique can minimise the impact of intrusive thoughts on the client and provide a mechanism for practising thought management.

Writing down fears and questioning their validity - Encouraging clients to write down their fears about unemployment can foster a new perspective. Fears are often generated through a “What if…” mindset.

When clients are invited to write down their negative mental scenarios about unemployment (such as bankruptcy, divorce, or the ending of one’s career), the reality of their fears may shift into a new frame. When discussed openly with a counsellor or simply observed on paper, previously worrying fears may be recognised as lacking any basis in reality.

Stage 3: Anger

Typically, anger management techniques focus on identifying personal triggers and strategies for managing one’s response to these triggers. In the event of sudden unemployment, the anger response is generally a natural reaction to a disempowering experience. Rather than responding in aggression or anger toward an ex-boss, a client is encouraged to experience the healthy expression of their anger.

If a client is experiencing anger as a result of sudden unemployment, it may be significantly beneficial for them to have that anger normalised. Normalising offers the client permission to feel angry and provides a platform for deeper levels of discussion.

In addition, encouraging clients to express their anger in a healthy way minimises the likelihood of denying or internalising the anger, which may potentially lead to feelings of disempowerment and despondency.

The expression of anger may occur through a variety of outlets - whether through physical outlets, such as running, punching a punching bag or working in the yard; or through creative outlets, such as expressive writing or art therapy. 

References

1. Birkel, J. D & Miller, S. J. (1998). Career bounce-back: The professionals in transition guide to recovery and reemployment. New York: Amacom.

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“If you break your neck, if you have nothing to eat, if your house is on fire, then you got a problem.  Everything else is inconvenience”.  Robert Fulghum

Life is full of stumbling blocks, and you are constantly put to test as you progress through its stages. And on the face of adversity, we can only do our best to overcome imminent challenges and move forward towards our goals – whether they are reflected in financial success, happiness, love, friendships, life balance or something else.

But how often do you REALLY show your best? Or how often do you “finish strong”?

We recommend that you watch the video below, from motivational speaker Nick Vujicic, and reflect about your approach to life’s daily challenges and your disposition to overcome them. It’s a great inspirational journey, reflected by a person who deeply believes in our capacity to rise to unprecedented heights.

Click on the PLAY button to watch Nick:

Next time you are faced with overwhelming challenges, remember to never give in and never give up. Or in Winston Churchill’s astute words, “if you’re going through hell, keep going.”

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In 1908, the richest man in the world at the time, the famous steel magnate Andrew Carnegie, commissioned Napoleon Hill to interview and study the 504 most successful people of the day. The objective was to distil which attributes these highly successful business pioneers had in common.

Hills resulting book, “Think and Grow Rich”, came out in 1937 and remains one of the best selling, most influential business books of all time. In the book, Hill outlines ‘13 Principals’ which his long research identified as being common to all successful people.

One of those principles was that of the Mastermind Group. Hill demonstrated that no successful person does it alone. All are surrounded by people who can help them, advise them, criticise them, encourage them, motivate them, inspire them and spark them to be better than they could ever be on their own.

Napoleon Hill defines a Mastermind as:

“Coordination of knowledge and effort, in a spirit of harmony, between two or more people, for the attainment of a definite purpose”…

…”This form of cooperative alliance has been the basis for nearly every great fortune. Your understanding of this great truth may definitely determine your financial status.”

He goes even further to suggest that people with a mastermind group around them can tap into an intelligence that is beyond themselves - that the coming together of multiple minds focused on a single purpose creates a fusion of intellect that can never be achieved by the individuals on their own.

How to Start Your Mastermind Group: The first thing you should do is start your search for appropriate mastermind members.  You can start within your circle of business associates or colleagues, or you can go outside to people who you do not know. 

For your first mastermind group - aim for 3-5 people.

This will be enough to start your group as it develops some longevity. The biggest problem with a mastermind group is making it stick together and happen on a consistent basis. People get busy and let other things get in the way, causing missed meetings, missed commitments, and lack of accountability to the group.

If you find a good solid group, and make the group a regular get together (once a month is the perfect timing for phone meetings - once a quarter for full day events), you can find a unique combination that lasts for years to come.

One other way to ensure everyone takes the mastermind seriously is to find a paid mastermind group (typically facilitated by someone else). When money is on the line, people tend to be a little more serious about doing business and keeping their commitments.

Rules of your Mastermind:

1. Show up every time, and on time.
2. Commit to helping everyone in the group grow their business.
3. Commit to helping everyone in the group become a better person.
4. Do what you say you will do - and always follow up on the commitments you make to the group.
5. Contribute - your ideas are valuable and necessary to making the Mastermind work.
6. As a group, commit that you will all do whatever it takes to get in the right creative mood to start your meeting.
7. Everyone should contribute ideas to others, and should expect ideas from everyone else.
8. Show up prepared and focused on maximum contribution.
9. Everything that gets discussed in a mastermind meeting is confidential information and must be treated so.

Depending on how far you want to take the rules, you can also have a 3 strike law in effect and the group can have voting power to ask 3 time rule-breakers to leave the group. Negative people, energy or feedback can destroy the positive intentions of a group. Choose your group carefully.

Keep in regular touch with your Mastermind members outside of your meetings. 

Various Ways to Run Mastermind Groups

1. Each person gets equal time - sharing your recent successes, challenges, missed deadlines, and biggest areas in need of help.
2. Shared lessons from all.  Have each person go around the room and share their greatest successes and lessons from all areas of business (marketing, advertising, finance, employees, payroll, operations, etc).
3. One person per meeting goes through their business in detail and only one business is focused on per meeting.
4. Critical priority - mixed from the above. Groups meet and do short introductions to what is happening in their business - those with critical issues express their need for help and they get priority status for help from the group.

For your first meeting, set aside more time than usual - at least 20-30 minutes per person. Go though the basic rules, and follow the system laid out here (talk about success, challenges, and top priority issues that need addressing now).

Masterminds can be a powerful force to help you live life more effectively.

Source: www.coachingclub.com.au

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There are several therapeutic approaches which are useful to improve clients’ readiness to change. It is important, however, to realize that all these strategies are based on the same suggestion: motivation to change is elicited from the client and not imposed from without.

Using coercion, persuasion or constructive confrontation will achieve little if the client is simply “unready” to change. It is the client’s task to articulate and resolve his/her own ambivalence in relation to change.

Stages of Change

Prochaska & DiClemente (1983) proposed a framework which comprised various stages of change. Putting such stages into the counselling perspective may help the counsellor understand the challenges within the process of change. Six stages were proposed, along with particular characteristics and techniques to support the client in moving forward:

Pre-contemplation: the client is not yet considering the option of changing his/her life. Useful techniques in this stage include: validating lack of readiness; encouraging re-evaluation of current behavioural patterns; encouraging self-exploration and progressive thinking; understanding the risks and limitations involved in the process of change.

Contemplation: the client is undecided about changing. Immediate change is unlikely to occur, however, it could occur within a month or so. Useful techniques in this stage include: clarifying to the client that the decision is his or hers; encouraging evaluation of benefits and disadvantages; promoting accountability; visualising positive outcomes.

Preparation: change begins to develop, and the client is testing the environment in order to ‘get a feel’ of the whole process. Useful techniques in this stage include: assisting problem-solving and identification of obstacles; developing supportive networks through family, friends and others (particularly if the process of change is radical); verifying the client’s skills towards change; encouraging self-reward and gradual development.

Action: this is the critical phase in which the client will change or return to his/her old habits. It usually lasts between 3-6 months. Useful techniques in this stage include: assisting the client in become more effective in the changing process and in conducting the behaviour; assisting the client overcome feelings of loss and nostalgia, whilst underlining the long-term benefits of the process.

Maintenance: this stage refers to the continued commitment to sustaining the new behaviour. It is the classic period where new habits develop into routinely tasks. Useful techniques in this stage include: follow-up and motivational support; overview of values and benefits derived from new behaviours; discussing coping with relapse.

Relapse: in this stage, old habits and behaviours resume which may affect the client’s self-confidence and beliefs. This usually involves a trigger, such as meeting an old friend from the period prior to change, or doing an activity which is perceived to have been part of the ‘old lifestyle’. Useful techniques in this stage include: evaluating with the client was triggered the relapse; reassessing motivation and establishing further goals and motivational sources; planning more effective coping strategies.

Motivational Interviewing

Motivational interviewing is a recent technique which aims to improve the client’s motivational levels, with an explicit focus on encouraging accountability and action from the client. This technique’s desired outcome is to make the client proactive and decisive towards change.

Five general principles of motivational interviewing include: expressing empathy, developing discrepancy, avoiding argument, rolling with resistance and supporting self-efficacy. By using these principles, the counsellor aims to develop the client’s self-confidence and ability to cope with the process of change. This is done both through the development of micro skills (similar to the coaching process) which are aimed to create efficient and effective behaviours, and the development of emotional awareness which well support the client in overcoming challenges as a result of change.

A crucial aspect of this technique is keeping constant focus on the positive side of things. Once this becomes a routine task, it is easier for the client to develop a positive mindset in order to achieve pre-set goals. Motivational interviewing strategies are particularly useful when integrated with the stages of change model.

Client-Centered Approach

Developed by Carl Rogers in the 1940s, this approach has proven useful for effective and constructive communication. It focuses on the client’s capacity for growth and change, using unconditional acceptance as a motivator (which encourages the client to also develop unconditional positive regard).

“The primary technique of client-centered counselling is to actively listen and reflect the client’s statements in a non-directive, nonjudgmental manner, thereby providing a safe environment for the client’s self-exploration. Client-centered counseling hinges on the development of a counselor-client relationship based on unconditional regard, often over multiple hour-long sessions. This relationship enables the counselor to clarify the client’s feelings without imposing external assessments or values.” (Sheon, 2004)

One of the aspects of this kind of counselling relationship is the perspective that the client and the counsellor are partners, moving together towards a common goal. This perspective of a partnership in the therapeutic process is a popular approach in life coaching and it has direct benefits to the client’s motivation and the relationship’s rapport building.

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